The name of the game is suffer

This past week was spent pretending I was all better. I tried to ride seriously on Tuesday and couldn’t, but was more successful on Thursday. I got done and my legs were actually sore. It is a familiar and comforting kind of pain. But the overwhelming feeling was that things weren’t the same. I couldn’t understand it or place my finger on the change. Was I still sick? Or was it just that 10 weeks of poor health and training dragging me down because I was out of shape. I couldn’t separate the feeling of sickness from the feeling of being tied. I was confusing the pain of a strong effort with the pain of your body telling you to cool it and rest. In the past I have always erred on the side of the first, but experience was telling me to be smarter.

So I have been treading lightly, trying to be smarter and trying to listen to my body. Part of this was justified, but part of this was honestly disbelief. I was having a hard time believing that I was actually healthy and getting to ride and train again. I took it easy Friday and Saturday in preparation for the WORS race on Sunday near Green Bay.

The drive was refreshing as it reminded me of the first few year of racing when I was 16 and 17. I just got my license and driving hours solo to a bike race blasting music while speeding down the road. I got to the venue at the reforestation camp north of Green Bay, signed up and got ready. It was very good to be back, and the welcome was warm. A few people seemed to be in as much disbelief as I was. Asking me if I knew where I was. Haha, maybe I didn’t. I missed the WORS family, and I could tell I was missed as well. Even Don gave me a welcome back.

But from the moment the word GO went out, the name of the game was suffer.  I had some luck on the start and missed a big tangle that happened just to my outside and slotted in in the top 20 as we headed into the fast open trails on the start loop. I sat in and watched those around me trying to stay within myself while holding the top 10 I had from moving up on the open trails. Then the hammer dropped, at least I think. It’s hard to say if they went faster or if I started going slower, but I started moving backwards.

The gaps had grown, so I was only losing 1 or 2 places at a time. In the first 2 laps I was caught by 3 or 4 groups of guys and ended up moving back into the high teens. I was suffering like a dog as people would catch and drop me. On lap 3 I looked back and the gap behind me was big enough that no one else was going to catch me. I started to push it to see what I could do. I passed one guy back half way through the lap. Then with 3 miles left I spotted 18^th place ahead. It was a ray of hope for a guy imprisoned in the pain cave. But let me take you back 5 hours at my parents in Milwaukee. Before I left for the race my dad and I were talking. He told me a story about Tom Danielson from the US Pro Challenge. When he won the stage into Aspen, he said that he wasn’t just riding for himself and his team; he was riding for his family. My dad told me that when I go out and race, that I was riding for my family as well. In the hustle of packing and leaving I didn’t stop to think. But at the moment when I was hurting the most, I found the strength to push harder by remembering that I was riding for the ones I love too.

I pushed hard to keep him in sight, but when we hit some technical sections I was able to pull back some time without expending too much effort.  We came out of the woods and I realized we had less than a mile of open double track before the finished. I put the power down. Not a full sprint but a seated pace and I slowly clawed him back coming into the final corner. I was right on his wheel and I stood up for a sprint and as I passed him you could tell he was cooked. It was rewarding to be there in the end.

Overall, I’m extremely happy with the result. The complete lack of training in the last 10 weeks and still feeling a little sick should have kept me down, but I pushed through. I’ve got a long way to go, but I know that I have the support of my family and friends just like they have my support. In the recent past, I’ve had it tough, but I had help getting through. I only hope that when someone calls for my help,  I can be there for them like they were there for me.

What can I say?

My ego imagines there are some people wondering why I have missed a lot of the racing in the last 10+ weeks. Well imaginary people, it’s been one thing after another. The broken collar bone was pretty un-fun, but I worked through it. Then 3 weeks back on the bike doing base miles trying to get my lost fitness back and muster up a little something to be proud of at the end of the season. And I was starting to feel pretty good too. But then I started to get a scratchy throat. I thought it would be a few days off and then back at it, but man was I wrong. I spent the next two days in my bed, barely able to sleep. A fever the first night, and a migraine so bad the second night, I was incapacitated. So I went to the doctor really hoping it was just a bad case of strep throat. After a quick blood test and mouth swab, the doctor told me I had mono.

WHAT THE FUCK?!? Pardon the language, but seriously? I didn’t want to believe it at first, but then again here I sit, 2 weeks later and still feeling crappy. I’ve only had one more fever and 2 migraines, but that’s not the worst. I just want to race again!

But honestly what can I say. There is nothing I can do. I keep trying to think there is some reason this happened, trying to rationalize it. But there is no rationality to it, it’s just the worst luck I’ve had in my life so far. I keep wanting to believe that because this happened, I’ll have an amazing year next year, or that I won’t be sick for a few years or something. But who knows? If there is one thing I’ve learned from this it’s that I sure as hell don’t know. So you just have to take the good when it comes, and deal with the bad when it comes. All we can do it hope that bad luck doesn’t come our way, but that only makes us feel better, it doesn’t actually help.

As you can see, I’ve had some time to think, between sleeping all day and night. But that’s all I have to say about that…

Hopefully a slightly more interesting topic is what I’ve been doing to pass the time. Well, mostly watching movies and playing Warcraft. I cleaned my room, but it got dirty again. Maybe I’ll clean it again. But the interesting one has been looking at wheel and frame design on bikes. If you’re interested, I highly encourage you to look into it. I’ve found that it’s actually something of a science. Well, motorcycles are at least. But everything transfers over, mostly.

To sum it up, the bicycle is one of the most complex vehicles we as humans have ever invented. I suppose there is a reason that even after almost 200 years of existence, people are still fascinated by them. And with good cause, because we really have only just begun to understand how they actually work.

Take for instance how a person is able to balance on a bike. Some would say it’s the wheels. Because they spin, they create a gyroscope effect which makes the bike more stable. Some might say it’s the angle and trail of the steering mechanism. Well, almost. Some recent(ish) mathematical and experimental analysis has shown that it’s not the gyroscope or the trail. It’s as simple as keeping the weight over the two wheels. If you’re more interested, the article below is a report on this research where they created a bike which balances itself. It has wheels which have mass spinning both ways (to cancel the gyroscopic effect) and negative trail.

http://bicycle.tudelft.nl/stablebicycle/StableBicyclev34Revised.pdf

or for those who don't know math

http://discovermagazine.com/2012/jan-feb/26

So how do we stay up? By turning. Each time we turn it moves the center of mass and the front wheel in relation to the rear wheel and the forward motion. Think of this as like putting a foot out to catch yourself, except it’s your front wheel. Now do this motion very slightly and over and over and over very quickly and you’re balancing! Ever notice how people who are new to riding don’t always go so straight and more experienced riders do? Exactly.

Counter steer is another interesting one. It’ related to leaning in a corner. The bike doesn’t actually turn solely because of its handle bars getting turned. In fact, it’s usually the opposite. The bike gets the majority of turning from leaning. The rider needs to balance 2 things when turning. First make the correct radius turn and second staying off the pavement. To do this they use the bars and leaning to keep the sum of the lateral forces correct to produce the turn and to keep the weight over the wheels. This, more often than we notice, produces a handle bar direction opposite of where we want to go. If you ask me, that’s pretty amazing to think our bodies can do that.

There is a ton more to learn about it, and I’ll continue to read until I can ride bikes again without getting tired after 20 minutes.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bicycle_and_motorcycle_dynamics

Wausau 24 and a few thoughts

A few weekends ago was my glorious return to off-road racing with the Wausau 24 at nine mile forest up nort. Of course I joke. I was hoping that my return would be incredible, that I would just start crushing it. The road back to form has been longer, tougher and more importantly eye opening. The most eye opening things is the realization of just how in shape I was before. I was wrapped up in the effort and racing to really stop and realize anything, but looking back I now understand. I think I understand now because I’m trying to get back there and it isn’t coming as easy as before.

But of course with off-road racing there is the strength and the skill. The strength will get there as it does with hard work and time. But the skill is something else. The skill takes effort, focus and a critical attitude to improve. Wausau 24 was perfect for his. Each lap was like its own mini race where I could practice my routine on getting ready, make small changes and then go out and see what worked best. I ended up doing 8 laps and by the time I was done, the confidence was back and I definitely think I made some serious gains. Of course those last few laps are like riding with an anchor in your shorts, but I suppose the single track skill plays an even more important part.

It was a long weekend or riding and it make me extremely tired. Not just in the legs, but mentally too. The legs are recovered, as much has they can, but the mind is still tired. Sleep just isn’t’ enough it seems after being on edge for 24 hours plus. But I’m not complaining. Matt Gehling said it best, “I remember why I don’t like 24 hour races, it just took me 12 hours to remember”.

Combine that mammoth effort with watching the Olympics non-stop like a zombie and I’ve been thinking about where all this riding and racing is going. The Olympics have this special aura about them. I saw an interview with Sam Schultz about the Olympics. He makes a good point, that the Olympics is that one race where you mention it, and suddenly everyone cares. Everyone knows what that means. I don't know if I could ever be that fast, but it's always fun to dream.