The year is over: 2 of 3

New Year’s was followed by a super restful week and really only enough intensity to keep the body from going stale. I felt tired during the week, but the power was big and the enthusiasm was big too. As a newer rider, I still am learning how to peak, so I had to rely on coach Gordy to get it right.. From what I could tell i was peaking right on time. I was able to make it out to the course a few times to watch some of the races, but as the week progressed and the forecast became clearer, I began to realize that things were going to be completely different than the current conditions at the time. The sloppy mud would thicken, and as temperatures dropped, it would completely freeze over. So pre-riding was limited. I did my openers and packed up the night before, and tried to get a good night’s sleep.

That morning the temperatures were low, but so was the wind. The course had a sense of wasteland to it. Hearing about the cold temperatures always makes you think a little, and with everyone else expressing their worry, it was easy to forget what I could handle. In reality, 15 degrees is nothing tough to handle for me. I’ll be honest that the CycleOps Warm Up tent did help a ton, but I came into it pretty worried. I got a couple laps in and dialed in the tire pressure. I ran a similar average pressure to what I normally do, but had a huge pressure difference between the front and rear. While this made the back end slide a lot, I was able to count on it in the rough stuff and not have to worry about flatting. The low pressure in the front allowed me to still get decent traction in the corners where there were not ruts. After a good warm up, it was off to the start line.

I need to take a moment to thank those who helped me. On Wednesday before the race I picked up a second set of mud wheels from Trek, the Bontrager Aeolus D3 wheels with Challenge Limus tires on them. I was honestly blown away. They are such a stiff and strong wheel set, spoiler alert, they held up in the race like a champ which is no small feat. Beyond the sponsor love, the KS Energy/Team Wisconsin crew was there helping out and cheering me on, even though I wasn’t in a KS kit, that’s team support. The whole UW crew was there too. We had a good group of people racing, and about as many there just helping out. Nick Frye and Andrew Rosch were in the pits and taking care of equipment. My parents were there helping keep me warm and well fed (thanks for the cookies) and of course Margy, my girlfriend was making sure those little details were all set. I think I had like 4 people willing to take my warm up jacket at the start. I think between Tom, Dino and Tyson, someone could have though I had a body guard squad at the start. haha! Thanks guys!

Conclusion will be up soon!

Trying to find my rhythm

Crashing and hurting yourself has some obvious consequences. The time off was tough because I lost a fair amount of fitness. Not being able to race in the races I wanted to, missing some of my season’s biggest goal races was even harder. As much as it was cool to see friends tearing it up in Idaho, it was bitter sweet knowing that I could have been there having success too. There were a lot of I could haves and what ifs running through my head, weighing me down and making it tough to push through and continue keeping focused on coming back. It’s funny, just because you want something doesn’t mean that you’ll have the drive to make it happen. I’ve had a taste of this for the first time in my life in the last few weeks, feeling afraid to try for fear of failure.

I think my fear was somewhat justified too. I have yet to get back on a mountain bike, still waiting for the doctor to clear me in a week. And while on the bike I was feeling uncomfortable. I wasn’t picking up where I left off. I was trying to re-learn a lot of what I spent years learning. There was a blockade standing in my way and for some reason I couldn’t just deal with it like before. It was almost like I forgot how to.

And this continued much the same into this past week’s rides. I was trying so hard to hit the numbers, to push myself, to go hard. But I couldn’t. I didn’t know if the numbers were wrong, or if I was just not up to it. After failing to push myself hard enough on the weekend, I was still feeling tired from the long hours. Not recovering right and felt dead Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. But something happened yesterday. Something happened that showed me the light at the end of the tunnel. It was distant and dull, but light is still light. During another FTP effort where I just couldn’t keep the pace up, I thought maybe I’m just not in a rhythm. So I focused, I push the pace and effort to a place where I knew I could hold it and just sat there. It hurt like all hell, but I stayed there. I focused to keep the cadence high and the effort high all the while keeping my gaze on the road ahead. I let my body do the work while I focused on the effort.

I think that’s the subtle difference. I was too focused on the pain and not focused enough on the effort. I was too focused on how hard I was going and not focused enough on how hard I should go. Hopefully this makes sense. Like I said, that light was short lived, as I only had 2 minutes left in my interval. But for that brief moment, I felt like I was strong. It wasn’t easy, but it was manageable. I found a rhythm and held it.

And this is true in the other aspect of my life/training (what’s the difference anymore?). I was eating whatever, getting takeout and subs almost every day. I was staying up too late. I was letting things sit and not dealing with them. I stopped doing the little things that alone don’t matter but together make all the difference. In the last few years I’ve become someone who can fix almost anything as long as I understand the problem. I thought I did with this one. I thought I knew how to get back going again. Turns out I didn’t, but I think I do now, but only the next week’s riding and training will tell.

I owe Gordy at Speed Cycling huge thanks. He picked me up this year and I was a little worried that my lack of results would be reason to kick me out. But after 4 weeks of recovery I contacted him letting him know I was ready to start riding again. We met and got things going again. His support was rock solid. His confidence in my abilities was noticeably deeper, and this played a big role in helping me figure this all out. But of course he stressed that we should focus more on handling skills, haha.He gave my training and remainder of the year some much needed refocusing. His experience and knowledge are there, but the caring is what makes Speed different. Gordy and all the coaches there care, like no other. When I went in 2 other coaches who I don’t really know all that well asked me how things were going, as if they understood the whole situation. I could go on and on about it, but I’ll sum it all up with a HUGE THANKS to the whole Speed Crew but even that isn’t enough.

http://www.speedmadison.com/

The next few weeks will be important. There will be lots of hard miles trying to get back to where I was and further. Then on the 23^rd I’ll get cleared to race and race off-road. The next race of any consequence will be Ore to Shore where I’m hopeful for a solid result to confirm that I’m making progress. I might race the Wausau 24 before that for some fun and some dirt practice, but we’ll see.

See you on the roads and trails!